Milly

Corb and I are both dog lovers. We have longed to get a dog since we got married in 2011. We were never afforded the place where a dog was welcomed. We finally bought our own home so we decided it was time to get a dog and surprise Chloee for Christmas! We searched and searched throughout November and December for a dog and could not seem to find the right one. Christmas was coming less than a week away and it was very discouraging. Maybe it wasn't time to get a dog.

 On the Tuesday before Christmas, Corbin looked once again on KSL to see if there would be new listings. Once he saw a post of the cutest shorkie ever (the kind I had been wanting and hoping for for years!) he stopped everything he was doing (like watching an important game, thanks babe!) to go see this darling puppy. 

 When Corb saw this cute pup, he knew instantly that she should be our dog. When he held and loved on her, he knew if he didn't bring her home, she would be taken by someone else. He asked the lady where the nearest bank was so he could pull out the cash and come right back to get her. 

When we surprised Chloee with Milly, she didn't think it was ours at first. She was so excited and shocked she just stood there and stared at her! 

She kept saying, "I can't believe this is our dog!" and "This is the best Christmas ever!"

We instantly fell in love with Milly. 

She became part of our family.

Because of the winter, we trained Milly on pee pads in our kitchen. Boy did she learn quick! She would stop whatever she was doing to walk to the pad and pee. We were so impressed with her.

When she wanted to snuggle, she would walk over to us while we were sitting on the couch and stand on her back legs until we would pick her up. We would lay back in the chair and she would walk up to our chest and lay right there by our neck or cuddle her face in our neck. It was my favorite thing.

When Corb would lie down on the floor on his stomach, Milly would climb on his back and find her spot to lay down. He absolutely loved that.

Tell me this isn't the cutest video..

When Milly started teething she LOVED chewing on our hands and fingers. All. The. Time.

At first it was fun and cute with her gums nibbling at our hands but when her teeth grew in it started to hurt! She was always so funny trying to get our hands when she had a bunch of toys we were trying to get her to play with. 

Chloee started to run around the couch to get Milly to chase her and that became one of our favorite things. She would stop and lay down mid run to trick you then once you got to her she would book it around the couch! Her little legs going to town.

Chloee did a great job helping us take care and train Milly. Every morning she would wake up, get Milly from her room (bathroom downstairs), let her go potty then would be with her until it was time to get ready for school. 

Corb and I would always put her to bed together. (I know, we treated her like our little baby! Because she was!!) I would always get teary eyed because I wanted to be with her!

 For the first few weeks we would take turns getting up at 3:00 AM when Milly was up and wanting to play. After a while she started sleeping through the night. Although, I missed our middle of the night play sessions. 

Milly was perfect. She would play (what Corb wanted). She would give loves and snuggles (what I wanted). She would tolerate whatever Chloee took her to do. :)

One morning we woke up and she had thrown up on her bed. We didn't think much of it because it is normal for dogs to throw up sometimes. But when we would wake up to throw up on her bed the next two nights, we were concerned. We thought maybe she had an allergy to the food we gave her. Corbin researched dog food and talked with people at the Petco until he found another food he felt comfortable getting.

Milly LOVED the new food and ate it like it was a steak dinner. We felt better and hoped it would work for her.

The next morning there was a huge spot of throw up, worse than before. She also started sleeping more and not playing as much. 

We were pretty worried now. Poor girl didn't look like she was feeling good.

Corb took Milly to the vet.

Initially, the vet thought it would be a liver shunt and would need a lot of testing. Corb knew they should just start with blood work. He knew if there was something wrong, the blood test would prove it. After about 20 min. after her blood was taken, the vet came back to show Corb the results. It was completely evident that her blood work was so bad, they immediately knew she was dying.

When I came home, Corbin was on the floor looking more sad than I had ever seen him. I didn't want to hear what he was going to say.. but it could be something we could fix, right?

Nope :(

He told me that Milly had kidney failure and that she wouldn't live much longer.

I looked at cute little Milly girl laying on the floor chewing her favorite chew ring and my heart dropped. I didn't want to believe what I just heard. It didn't make sense. She was our perfect puppy.

I went to Milly and just put my arms around her and stuck my face by her fur and just cried. 

I cried hard. 

Corb called Chloee down to tell her the news. Chloee doesn't deserve to have her puppy taken from her. She needs Milly. I felt so horrible.

We all just bawled our eyes out as we were confused at the sudden news and trying to accept that Milly would leave us soon.

After that, Corbin went into research mode. He was reading everything he could find on Kidney disease in dogs. Symptoms, how to treat, studies on other dogs... you name it, he read it.

We didn't want to do anything that weekend but just be with Milly.

We got her prescription dog food that wouldn't be so harsh on her kidneys. We could tell it wasn't very good. She wouldn't eat as much and even when she did, it was only a matter of time until she would throw it back up.

It really sucked watching her suffer. 

We know she is just a puppy. And maybe others won't understand why this was so hard for us. And some of you will! I just can't explain why she was so special.

(I do know that maybe some of you reading this may have lost a baby, sibling, parent or friend. I know this is nothing compared to your loss. I don't know what that is like and I just want to say I am sorry. I want to hug you and cry with you. You WILL see them again someday.)

We had to talk about the inevitable. To plan for when we had to put her down. (Oh how much we hated talking about this, it just felt wrong.)

We wanted to make sure we could give her a shot to fall asleep before the shot to stop her heart. We wanted her last sight as she fell asleep to be us there comforting her. 

And that's what we did.

I don't want to write all the details because I just don't want to re live or remember this day.

But what I will say is... It was the hardest thing I've ever done.

 And... that I didn't want to leave without her. And... I couldn't seem to smell her head enough to take her smell home with me.

What I did take solace in, is knowing I will see Milly again. I have a strong testimony in families being together again after death. She was family. I have no doubt that our beloved pets are a part of the plan of salvation. God created animals, he loves all of his creations and they will also be restored.

Until we meet again, our sweet Milly girl. <3

Enjoy the moments we captured!

Baby Milly<3

Best. Christmas. Ever.

Miss those snuggles.

Middle of the night play session.

 This was Heaven.

 She loved to lay on her back!

Chlo and Mill watching the snow as I ran <3

Yep. Her own stocking.

Silly girl!

Chlo lovin' on Mill.

We finally had our own fur baby in the family Christmas picture!

She was so soft.

Happy girl!

Best buds!

Nappy time.

Loved the back sleeps.

A perfect pup.

Snugglin' her favorite toy.

Those puppy eyes<3

Hangin' with daddy in her spot!

She was one in a Milly.

Haha. Lazy time.

Chillin' while I did my makeup!

Time to wrestle.

 She found a prizey!

I miss her fur and smell<3

Chlo and her best friend playing with Mill!

Her neighbor friend! (never got to play together in the sun dang it!)

Just chillin' in the car. She looks so "cool" haha

Her bedtime set up in the kitchen after graduating from the downstairs bathroom. 

Yes, I took a picture haha.

The day we found out the bad news. On our way to get her prescription food. 

I remember thinking that someday I will want to go back to this moment when she is gone. So I snapped a pic. She was so cute snuggling on me in the car.

It was finally a sunny day so we took advantage of it and took her to a park nearby. 

She deserved to enjoy being outside and be able to run around.

She tried running a little but we could tell she was too tired and cold. After all, she was loosing weight.

She sat and watched Chloee play at the playground and just looked around to take it all in.

Hello from the top of the stairs!

Simply adorable<3

It had been a couple hard days and I just had to run. When I got down to do some sit ups, she kept coming to sit on my stomach. I couldn't resist. No more sit ups. They didn't matter. Just time with her.

The best snuggles.

In love.

Poor girl not feeling good.

 Trying to make the best out of this sad time.

She was finally feeling up to chewing on her favorite ever chew ring.

Found this on our whiteboard:)

(it is still there, I never want to erase it!)

 Chlo soaking up her time with Milly.

 Enjoying the night.

 We were so confused trying to figure out why this was happening.

May you rest in peace our sweet Milly girl. You can now run free of your pain. 

You deserve to feel perfect in Heaven. 

 Momcat took this picture of our hands with Milly and gave us the picture in the frame. Thank you so much. I also made that ceramic tile to put with her things.

Back home with us in her bed with her favorite things<3

She's in good hands<3

Thanks for reading:)